UGH the two week wait and cranky toddler!

Okay so early Monday morning we had our follow up u/s and ta dah my follicles grew! I had two in the right ovary one 20mm and another 16mm! whoo hoo go me oh yea! lol Only thing left was one more dang shot! Dr. Mogadham asked us to go ahead and do our trigger shot right then and there. So at about 9:30am Monday Jeremy gave me the Ovidrel shot. Lets just say for the next three days Jeremy was a VERY happy man! lol It was fun tho, candles, bubble baths the whole nine yards.

 But now is the real hard part WAITING!!!!!!!!!!!!! I almost feel helpless like there is absolutely NONETHING I can do but hope and pray one of the eggs(maybe even both =}) sticks. I know I shouldn't but I can't help but to have the highest hopes possible. I know I'm setting my self up for a huge fall if it doesn't work. I just think if I even doubt it a tiny bit then it won't. Positive thoughts attack positive outcomes, right!?! lol I just want something to go right and be lucky for something to work on the first try. Its hard to believe I've been on some kind of fertility drug for over six months now. I try to stay strong and positive but I really want this part to be over and onto the long pregnancy journey!

Jeremy asked the other day "your gona be a ridiculous mess if you blood work comes back negative aren't you" my response was "it will be catastrophic if it does, you should probably go ahead and have a "it will be okay babe" package just in case, oh and I'm gona want a lot of cheese burgers and frys" lol

So not only am I going stir crazy but I've gained about 6lbs the past two months!!! To some thats not a big deal but when your only 5'1'' is a ton. I just want to be back down to 113 again.:( I don't want to gain all this weight then finally get pregnant and I have a extra 10lbs already. I have been eating a small breakfast, a very healthy lunch, and a small balanced dinner. I've also started drinking nothing but water except at dinner I get a glass of something else. Oh and NO dessert! Shocker I still gained 3lbs threw out the week! lol fml

Of course during this physically and mental trying week (fyi: I discovered the ovidrel shot is HcG aka the pregnancy hormone. None the less I feel pregnant lol) Zackary decides he's gona try out the terrible two's! I have to say this past work was wost than him having colic. He just cried, screamed, threw everything, and refused to listen to anything I had to say. We took down his packnplay thinking he was big boy and would be fine with just his crib upstairs, little do we know. lol I told Jeremy Thursday during the middle of a melt down to put the damn thing back up. Since then every time Zack is having a moment we do what we did before, put him in there and let him calm down. What would ya know in just a few days he's starting to get better. lol parent fail!

Oh and since I'm the luckiest girl alive, Jeremy has had long days with very early mornings (leaving the house at 4:30am). But wait it gets better he has 24hr staff duty today on a Saturday. lmao We made the best of it tho, we had some subway together and watch shrek 4.

Middle of Injectables Cycle #1

Well we had our base line u/s and bw(ultrasound & bloodwork) as soon as we came home from holiday vacation. We received the wonderful news that the horrible cyst was gone and the birth control had done its job. That evening our journey began with the starting of Femera, I took two 2.5 tablets every night for 5 days. The following Monday Jan.10, 2011 Jeremy gave me my first shot of Follistim, and it suddenly all became very real. Up until then I knew I struggled with infertility and knew my body didn't do the one true purpose of a women, but for some reason I guess I in denial. (even if it did take almost 2.5 to conceive Zack) For some strange reason when that needle pierced my skin it was yet another VERY blunt reminder that my girly parts were broken.We continued our shots for another four night each night it got a little bit better. After administering my shot Jeremy would kiss my boo boo and say "okay now you go and help zacky's brother and sisters grow big so they can be born". He has truly made this as less stressful as possible, he totally takes all the angst out of it and treats it like its no big deal and surprisingly it helps.

Finally on Friday Jan.14, 2011 we went in for my mid cycle u/s and b.w. to check on my progress, typically this would be the day I would take my trigger shot Ovidrel to cause ovulation. We started with checking my uterus like always the lining was starting to thicken up and was 7.9mm, he said they like to see it 7+, so I was doing okay there. Dr.Moghadam then checked my ovaries next to see how my follicles were doing, like he thought they were growing but not very fast. I had about 4 different follicles that were around 10mm and one 13mm, he was a bit concerned that I had many that were all trying to grow and all at the same speed.The follicles need to be between 17-20ish mm for me to take my trigger shot. He said it would be completely up to us if we wanted to continue with the cycle. Dr.Moghadam contiued saying "we've figured out the problem and have found the answer to fix it so now its just what we want to do". Jeremy and I have talked this over many times and gladly welcome the idea of twins! We know without our insurance there is no way we could logically go threw with all of this, for just this months medications we have racked up over $3,000!!!!! Thats not even including all the ultrasounds, bloodwork, office visits, or the sperm check.

We have been very positive this month and are so thankful for all our family and friends being there for us. We truly appreciate all the prays and positive thoughts our way. THANK YOU from the bottom of our hearts.

My next appointment is Monday Jan.17 2011 at 8:30am to see how much our beautiful futur children have grown!